You are horrible at faking enthusiasm for new company initiatives.
And you know you don't fool anyone.
You’ve been known to lash out at your coworkers.
But seriously, they need to stop humming along to that '80s playlist. IF I HEAR “JESSIE'S GIRL ONE MORE TIME…”
When Halloween rolls around, you cannot be bothered to participate in the office costume contest.
Whatever you're wearing that day is your costume. And it should win.
You’ve never once been considered for the role of fire marshall.
You're no good in a panic.